Being calm and confident has never been that easy
I think we’ve all wondered at some point in our lives how to be calm and confident. After reading Jen Sincero’s “You Are a Badass”, I decided to write a blog post about tips to change your life for the better and shape you as a person.
First of all, if you want to live the life you never had, you have to do the things you never did. That’s the number one rule you need to know if you want to learn how to totally change your everyday life. You can’t expect new results if you keep doing the same old things.
Our subconscious mind plays a huge role in everything. If you’re happy and confident and have learned how to be in love with yourself, then no obstacle can bother you.
Calm and confident people don’t care about other people’s opinions. They’re too busy trying to live the life they want to live.
We doubt ourselves too much, although there’s actually no reason to. If you’re trying to figure out how to start believing in yourself, I have a piece of advice for you—you need to change your mindset.
There are actually quite a few tips that teach you all about being calm and confident. I’m going to share my knowledge with you now. Keep reading if you want to know how to be confident in everything you do.
What exactly is a calm and confident mindset?
A calm and confident mindset is a state of being where you feel relaxed, focused, and in control of your emotions even when you’re facing stressful situations, like applying for a job interview as a job candidate or an upcoming exam as a college student.
The most effective way to achieve this mindset is to work with your unconscious mind, and that’s what we’re going to talk about soon.
A calm and confident mindset is a powerful tool that can help you in a variety of situations, from dealing with anxiety disorders to performing in front of an audience.
One of the most powerful mind hacks to help you stay calm and confident is to pay attention to your body language. By standing tall and keeping your shoulders back, you’ll feel more confident, and others will see you as more confident as well.
Letting go of the things that are out of your control is also an important part of a calm and confident mindset. Instead, focus on what you can control, such as your thoughts, feelings, and actions.
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Now I’m going to show you how to be more calm and confident
1. Value how unique you are
No one in this world will be exactly like you. Sure, there might be people who have the same talents as you, but no one will use these talents the way you will. Don’t ever be ashamed of yourself, because this way you’re letting down the whole world.
2. Positive affirmations
It’s a good idea to rewire your brain by practicing positive affirmations. Think about the phrases you really need to hear and say them out loud throughout the day. Write them down. The stronger a phrase makes you feel, the stronger the power it has to change your life.
3. Do what you love
Try to listen to what you’re saying, try to see what you’re doing, and work towards increasing positivity in your own life. It actually doesn’t matter which way you do that. Just start now.
Try to care less about what other people think about you and your actions. They don’t know what’s good for you. By caring too much about their opinion, you’re almost like their slave. Break free and do only the things that bring you joy.
4. Set your priorities first
Taking care of yourself doesn’t mean you’re selfish; it means you’re a happier person in the long run. Besides, if you can’t love yourself, how can you love someone else?
You also can’t hope for other people to fix you, because that’s not a very healthy approach. Start loving yourself first, and then spread this love.
5. Find a replacement for negative talk
We are all probably wondering how to be confident when talking to other people, but do we ever think about the dialogue we have with ourselves? How can you ever be in love with yourself if you keep bringing yourself down?
We’re so used to negative talk that we might think it’s actually true. However, if you become aware of your thought patterns, actions, and negative emotions, you’ll be able to change them.
If you look in the mirror and think “ew”, then change it. Instead, every time you look in the mirror, think, “I’m beautiful, and I deserve love.”
The first time can be scary, but once you get the hang of it, it’s a great way to feel confident in yourself.
6. Get rid of toxic thinking
Get rid of the idea that the person you are today is the person you actually have to be. If you’re wondering how to be calm and confident, this is my number one tip. Toxic thinking doesn’t let you use your full potential.
You can always change and evolve as a person if you only choose to do so. Don’t waste your life dwelling on negative thoughts about yourself that aren’t true at all.
Besides, if you worry about something that MIGHT happen in the future and it actually happens, you’re putting yourself through it twice. Why would you want to consciously torture yourself like that?
7. Stop making fun of yourself
It can be fun, and being able to laugh at yourself is a good quality, but it shouldn’t become the center of your life.
By making fun of yourself, you’re undervaluing yourself and also diminishing your worth in other people’s eyes. The things we say out loud or think about every day affect us more than we know.
Our thoughts become our words. Our words become our beliefs. Our beliefs become our actions. Our actions become our habits. And our habits become our reality. If you keep saying that your resting B face scares away all potential dates, then eventually it will become a reality.
8. Let love into your life
Learn to accept compliments and not push them back. Take care of your body and treat it the best way you can. Keep in mind that your physical and mental health are correlated with each other.
The better your physical health is, the happier and more productive you’ll feel. Let love enter your life. Always be kind to yourself.
9. Stop comparing yourself to other people
It’s the fastest way to drain the joy from life. You’ll never learn how to start believing in yourself if you keep comparing yourself to other people. You’re basically telling yourself that the person you are right now is not okay.
But it is! Striving for better doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you; it means you want to become an even better version of yourself. It’s the most important thing to keep in mind.
It doesn’t matter what other people do. We’re all on different paths, and our lives can’t be the same. What matters is that you’re enjoying yourself and YOUR life, and you’re happy with what you’re creating.
10. Stop feeling guilty about your past actions
Feeling guilty doesn’t make you a better person, but it does make you a sadder one. It’s unhealthy. Guilt, being too harsh on yourself, and shame are the things that destroy you the most.
Therefore, forgiving yourself is what lifts you up. Holding onto your negative feelings hurts you and the people around you and won’t let you live your life to the fullest.
The moment you decide to forgive and let go is the moment you’ll be on your way to freedom. Forgiving doesn’t mean only being nice to other people. It’s a favor to yourself as well.
The more you’re hung up on a situation you have no control over, the more you’ll struggle.
It’s deep in your subconscious mind, and it’s ruining your life. You can’t change the past, but you can choose how to move forward. By forgiving someone, you’re letting them off the hook, and therefore, you’re letting yourself off the hook as well.
Try to find sympathy. Showing compassion to people who did something horrible might sound like a bad idea, but hear me out.
We all act based on the information we have. People often behave improperly because they’re either in pain, confused, or both. If they do those horrible things, they do it because they don’t know better.
They’re only trying to cope with this world to protect themselves. Look at things from a different perspective. The truth is, you might not always be right. It’s harsh, but it’s true. Don’t assume things, and don’t bother yourself with something you have no proof of.
11. Let the rage out
Go somewhere where you can’t be seen or heard. Kick something until you feel like you’ve let the rage out. Then forget it and start over on a new page. Treat people as new pages.
If you expect them to behave badly, they most likely will because that’s what you’re attracting.
I’m not saying that it’s your fault that people behave badly, but I’m saying we should try to understand other people more because you never know what someone is going through or why they’re acting that way.
Keep in mind that you’ll get what you focus on, and your focus becomes your reality.
12. Don’t waste your valuable time thinking about what other people think or say
Every time you do something, ask yourself, “Why?” Why are you doing this? To be liked by other people? To feel better about yourself? Because it’s fun? Because you feel the need to do that?
Is it taking you where you want to be (not where you’re supposed to be by “social standards”)? Can this hurt anyone else during this process?
Think about your motives and be honest. This helps you do things that are healthy and lead you towards a better life. Besides, are the things you want to do scarier than the life you’re living right now?
You’re responsible for your words and actions, not whether other people like them. What other people think about you has nothing to do with who you are, but with who they are. What matters is what’s right for you. If you stay true to this, you’ve already won in life.
13. Give your best
If we’re talking about how to be calm and confident, we need to talk about making an effort. No matter what you do, give it your best.
If you know you didn’t give your best or if you don’t believe in what you’re doing, you’ll start feeling unconfident and doubting yourself. Always give your best, and you don’t have to worry about what other people think.
14. Have good attention toward everything you have
Be grateful. It helps make the world a better place, and it will increase your positive vibes. Therefore, you’ll attract people and life experiences that are needed to help you achieve your dream life.
15. Trust your intuition
How many times have you told yourself, “I should’ve trusted my gut”? You have an amazing inner guide. All the answers are within you. The more focused and balanced you are, the more aligned with yourself you are.
16. Find a hero
Think about someone who really inspires and motivates you. It could be one of your family members or a total stranger. Now think about why exactly this person impresses you. How does this person inspire you?
Every time you’re facing an obstacle, ask yourself, “How would this person act?” It’s not easy if you’re just starting out on your journey toward not caring about what other people think. However, if you find a mentor to follow, it’ll become easier.
17. Love yourself
I know that sometimes it can be a struggle to be in love with yourself. However, loving yourself does not mean you should turn a blind eye to all opinions about yourself.
Sometimes, constructive criticism helps us become better. Don’t become offensive. When someone says something about you, ask yourself, “Are they right?”
Be honest with yourself. Can you use this information to change your life and other people’s lives for the better? If the answer is yes, then use this information to change something. If the answer is no, then let it go.
Sometimes it’s easier for other people to see what we can’t see. If they can help us see ourselves better and help us live a happier life, then we should listen to them. It’s in correlation with your inner voice.
The more you listen to your inner voice, the easier it is for you to put other people’s opinions to use and not let them dictate your life. However, never apologize for who you are. By doing this, you are letting the whole world down.
18. Imagine that you’re an alien
You just landed on Earth, and you’re going to live in your body. Analyze yourself. What do you see? What is the person whose body you’re occupying good at? What do they like doing? What makes them happy? What resources can they use to fulfill their dreams?
Think about what the alien would do. Bear in mind that for this alien, everything is new, and they aren’t biased.
This exercise is good because it gives you a new perspective. It helps you to ditch your ridiculous excuses and habits. Sometimes you need to take a fresh look at things to see how to start believing in yourself and how truly happy you are.
19. Take the first right step
Instead of putting off starting something for hours, days, or even weeks, do it right now. The time we spend thinking instead of doing is enormous. You don’t have to know exactly where you want to go.
Start with something that feels right and let the flow take you somewhere. We’ll get most answers by taking action, not by thinking. Test how far you can go. Everything you’re doing on your journey helps you get where you want to go.
You don’t need to invent the wheel. There are people who have known since birth what they want to do with the rest of their lives. If you don’t know that, that’s fine. Do what feels good right now, and you’re already living a happy life.
20. Ask, and it will be given
There’s no magic formula that will show you how to be calm and confident from day one because building true confidence takes time and patience. However, you can speed up this process by manifesting.
I’m a huge believer in manifesting and the law of attraction. It’s the simplest way to manifest your ideal life. As part of my productive morning routine, I try to manifest every morning.
When you’re manifesting, try to also act and feel as if you already have the thing you want. I know many people don’t recommend it, but I believe in faking it until you make it.
If your goal is to become rich, think about what rich people do and have the same mindset. Stay open to possibilities that might lead you to your dream life.
21. Upgrade your environment
It’s hard to keep your thoughts on your dream life if you come home after a long workday and all you see are those dull white walls you hate so much. You can either move or just change the environment you live in.
Paint the walls, buy new plants or furniture, and hang inspirational photos on the wall. This way, you’re also letting the universe know that you’re doing anything you can to move forward.
22. Surround yourself with people who think the way you want to think
Stay away from narrow-minded people whose only goal is to bring you down. Connect with people who see limitless opportunities everywhere, people who find nothing impossible.
It’s a proven fact that people around us shape our thoughts and play a huge role in who we are as people.
Besides, if you’re struggling, you can always ask people around you how to be a calm person. They might have some awesome tips to transform your life for the better that you had no idea about.
23. To get, you need to give
Giving is a good thing to do if you’re trying to figure out how to totally improve your life. Giving demonstrates that you’re not selfish, and it makes you feel good, so you will increase your positive vibes. As we all know, positive vibes attract more positive things.
Donate to charities. Give as much as you can. It doesn’t need to be a lot. If you can donate five dollars a month, that’s fine. The key element here is to do it consistently so that giving becomes a part of your nature.
24. Smile, give compliments, and make people laugh
If someone is being sarcastic, instead of saying something mean back, show them love. Be grateful. If you’re grateful and focus on what’s good, then your connection to the universe is strong, which means you’ll be more likely to achieve your dream life and attract good things.
25. Always try to have a positive approach
Whenever something happens to you that you might not like so much, try to have a positive approach. Instead of thinking, “Why did it happen to me?”, think about why this particular thing is good.
Really focus on the good part and try to be thankful for it. Because if you focus on negative things, it will decrease your positive vibes and attract more negativity. Try to see positivity in everything, as it also helps you grow as a person.
26. Stop procrastinating
Postponing things is the most popular way to sabotage yourself because it’s seriously easy. If we say we can’t do something, it doesn’t mean we are actually not able to do it. It means we’re afraid to try. We spend so much time coming up with excuses.
Try to remember that done is better than perfect. No one cares if something you do is not perfect. In fact, they might not even notice it. And to be honest, nothing will ever be perfect, so just take action NOW.
Start this blog you’ve been wanting to start NOW! Start working on your side hustle! Leave that toxic relationship behind!
Stop focusing on how much you have to do. If you know you’re someone who leaves everything until the very last minute and you feel like you absolutely can’t change it, then why waste so much time stressing about it?
Just write a to-do list. Then figure out how long it takes you to work on a certain task and do other things until the clock starts to tick.
27. Watch your mouth
What’s funny is that it happens quite often that when something bothers us about other people in real life, it’s the same thing that bothers us about ourselves. It might be something you’re so strongly trying to suppress.
28. Ditch your bad habits
Let go of all those bad habits that are preventing you from reaching your full potential. Replace them with good habits.
Don’t just think, “Oh, I need to stop biting my nails.” Come up with a plan on how to stop doing it. Incorporate those steps into your daily routine. Believe you can, and you will.
Whenever you have a negative opinion about someone or something, try to keep it to yourself. Try to think about what triggers that particular negative emotion and how you can change it.
Does it really matter what you think of someone else? You know very well that it actually does not. You’re just wasting your valuable energy this way.
If you’ve run out of good habits to start adapting, read my blog post about 50 habits you can adapt to drastically change your life. They are seriously easy, yet they’ll really increase your quality of life.
29. Do some breathing exercises
One of the most effective ways to learn how to be calm and confident is through deep breathing. Taking deep breaths can help slow down your heart rate and activate the parasympathetic nervous system, which can reduce the likelihood of panic attacks.
The good news is that spending time practicing deep breathing and other techniques can lead to greater confidence and positive emotions in social situations and other areas of life.
In fact, research has shown that deep breathing can improve brain function and even reduce the symptoms of anxiety disorders.
So the next time you find yourself in front of an audience or in a high-pressure situation, take a few deep breaths and focus on the things you can control. With a little practice, you’ll be well on your way to achieving a calm and confident mindset.
So, that’s you you can learn how to be calm and confident
What did you think of my blog post about how to be calm and confident in life? Have you learned the secret that helps you be confident in yourself? Let me know in the comments below!
I’m a personal growth and self-care expert, as well as an avid motorcycle enthusiast and coffee and sweets lover. Through Lauraconteuse, I provide insightful and practical advice on topics such as self-care, self-love, personal growth, and productivity, drawing from my very own extensive experience and knowledge in the field. My blog has helped countless people achieve their goals and live more fulfilling lives, and my goal is to continue to inspire and empower others.